i miss you "terribly"

so thats what you told me, and still you havent proved that. im tired of getting all these txts and emails telling me how much you miss, how your sorry that you havent been around, and that you will make time for me. I guess you can only change for a few days. its back to normal again, no phone calls back or texts. im stuck in a rut..i cant make up my mind. ive done so much for you over the years and i know i dont deserve to be treated like a doormat, but thats what you do. im sorry...and i have nothing to apoligize for but i keep making myself think i do. i wish i new what happened...i cant write anymore